Friday, June 29, 2018

i know i just updated but

man we had some wicked bad storms yesterday and the power went out for 12 hours.

it got soooo hot i had to sleep in the livingroom on the couch

there's been so many storms this week. I hope everyone that might read this is ok.

In a slightly related note:
I hope everybody reading this knows I can SEE when they visit my blog.
not only that, I can see HOW MANY TIMES they do.
and when the location is, for certain, a place where I know someone.... oh, lets say Kentucky. Just for shits and giggles. I can see how many times a day you check this page.

so maybe i will update more. if you're hoping for more information on horrible little ole me.

hahaha ok anyway
i dont mind you reading this i was trying to make a joke and it didn't turn out right.
the joke was im horrible person etcetc etc etc

we usually eat pizza on fridays but we just had that last night because the power was out (for 12 hours straight btw)
and we asked Stan to bring us dinner. He is so very kind.

so I have no idea what we will eat tonight.

also i am sad because my chromebook is trying to go out on me. it reboots when i try to load three pages at once and it never used to have problems with this. its mostly when i try to load facebook. which makes me sad because thats how i talk to stan and april all day.

I have to pee every 30 mins.
I have a lot of pregnancy sypmtoms but there is no way in HELL i can be pregnant.
I have been vomiting randomly. the smells make me so nauseated I can't stand it... when i try to wash dishes I get sick.
I get food cravings (but i'm trying to blame that on my new medicine)


this new medicine could possibly the reason for a lot of this. I hope. even though these sideaffects aren't listed in the medication info pamplet. and i've read the whole thing just to be sure i know everything.

Wednesday, June 27, 2018


ok so

I havent updated in AGES

so I will talk about the KY trip

we left friday and came back tuesday
we were gonna come back monday but we were too tired (or stan was and he has to drive)
the trip was good. I got to spend a lot of time with my mother in law (one of my favorite people)
stan and i went to his class reunion on saturday
I had to borrow clothes from his mom because the dress i wanted to wear was like three sizes too big and ithought it would be ok but when i put it on again i hated it a lot
so i borrowed a shirt and it looked pretty good
i wish i had dressed up more but stan promised me it was ok

we hung out with stans friend Meg. and we also went to see Tanners new place and get a lot of movies and stuff from him (digital on a hard drive stan has)

I was sick most of the time we were there. Indigestion so bad I was vomiting. NOT FUN
but i managed to stay in moderately good spirits
or i tried to

stans mom gave us some dog treats for the babies and they love them
Little Bear was adorable... i am definitely going to get a Shih-Tzu when we get our own place
(stan is getting a dog he wants and i'm getting one i like)

it rained a LOOOOOT while we were on vacation and on the way back it did too

I have an appointment on July 2nd with my head shrinker (lol mr. finger)

we are back home and its so HOT
heat advisory and everything

my dad is making some different wall plaques and they look so good! i am so proud of my dad with all his work

I am ALMOST finished with Pokemon Ultra Sun the second time lol

tonight mom is staying with pawpaw which is good because he gets lonely
and dad too i think

stan and i are alone with dinner which is fun but i have to get him to get me something i can eat and not have acid reflux really bad

I am so happy right now even though I feel sick almost 24/7

its about to storm so i'm gonna finish this and turn off my computer.
i have a weird fear of my computer getting hit by lightining

I wanna update about everything

But my Chromebook won't. Turn on and I can't type proper. On my. Phone =(

Thursday, June 7, 2018

week of the 4th through the 10th

so the first have of this week has been pretty lax
i've had some weird sleep all day and night moments but I feel okay emotionally and mentally so I am not too worried about it

today i had a lot of chores to do so i am feeling very productive and i thought i would continue that feeling by blogging today

tomorrow i have to get everything ready for saturday
because saturday is the AP awards and I am going with Stan and I am excited
I am wearing my great grandmas dress. i dont care its vintage and i love it i don't care of it's not in style

after that is sunday which is laundry day and stan will need to rest from saturday

next monday i have an appointment with my psychologist/therapist and i need to make sure i write good journal notes on the AP awards banquet because we are trying to build my self esteem so i can function normally as a person

the fact that i am going to wear an old dress and have confidence is a good sign no?

then we have fathers day and i really hope stan talks to his dad and they have a good conversation.
I miss the relationship with Stans dad and them but I cant get it back and there's nothing i can do but just make sure Stan keeps in touch with them and keeps a good relationship with them despite me not being able to be there too. I know how important his Dad is to him and it would break my heart if they stopped talking. I have been really hard on myself about that because of how I understand the bond with  a father figure (i'm really close with my dad too)

I dunno.

lots of mixed feelings and sad and good and excited.

but i guess thats what normal life feels like, isn't it?
i will find out one day.
i hope

Friday, June 1, 2018

Post crawfish boil post

So at the boil I was ok for the most part... But my anxiety meds made me feel like I was falling asleep. So that on top.of feeling left out because i couldnt drink... or chose not to because its the right thing to do for my health.

I just went to to bed so that's sad...Because I missed out on all the games and cards games and stuff.

booo lol its ok i chose to sleep

on thursday we had to go to birmingham for my psychologist appointment and he said i am working on a lot of stuff and he seems pleased with my progress or atleast my attempts and things to get better. we have really good discussions and the cognitive therapy is really good for me.

this weekend we are going out with two friends to the movies well, they're a couple. so it's a double date. which is fun. we are seeing the movie Solo.

stan and i also have two other movies to see soon. but its gonna have to wait because next weekend is an awards banquet we are going to. and the next is fathers day. and the next we will be going to KY for stan's class reunion (I am really excited about this and I get to see Stan's mom which is the best thing EVER. I love her so much)

I am going to wear my great grandmas dress to the awards banquet !!!!

and a dress from my mom to the reunion

I am excited. i think i'm gonna wear red shoes with the dress to the reunion because i can wear any color with the dress and i think red shoes would really "POP"

its supposed to storm today!

i'm gonna goahead and publish this now.

my scheduled blog post

I have set up a habit tracker to try and motivate and keep track of my stuff so i have schedule to blog today. there is a lot going on. i...