Friday, March 30, 2018

March 30, 2018

So.... Update.
My Meds have been adjusted to "sleepy 24/7" levels but I'm Not manic anymore.
I'm not even sure how I Feel about it.
I'm trying to be more creative,  in general, in life. and also more  attentive to my social Media
This blog included.
I thought I would use the voice to text feature but the little microphone isn't here so. Idek wtf.

Destined to Fail at touchscreen typing for the rest of my days.

We gotta color Easter eggs today or Tomorrow

Stan and I are going to church on Sunday and I'm wearing my old school Granny dress that looks Like it's from the 1950s and I'm Pretty sure it issss from the 50s
So that's cool as hell

I really hope Easter service isn't too long.
Also. Strangely Enough it was Stans idea to go to church. So that was interesting to me.

I Woke up at 2 or 3 Back to Sleep at 4. Up at 6. I have to tend to the doggies all night when mom and dad aren't here.

Next week is mine and Stan's 4 years of dating anniversary. And my 32 birthday.

On April 17th I'm getting more teeth pulled. And after that I won't be able to eat solid food. Probably ever again....

And on April 19th I Have  psychiatrist and psychologist appointments back to back. Literally.

On April 27-29th we are busy with 3 different things.

April is Gonna be a pretty busy month all in all.

Monday, March 19, 2018

KY vacay summary post

Saturday:
We left on time (i think)
I made stan stop for me to pee a lot hahahaha.
I fell asleep TWO TIMES. and managed to vlog on in the car. hahaha

We got to Lexington at 5pm (given type change)
My father-in-law made a DELICIOUS DELICIOUS DELICIOUS home made dinner, which was awesome because I was totally not into getting dressed and going out


Sunday:
we had a light brunch at the house--- I had scrambled eggs and bacon cooked in the over it was DELICIOUS
we had a mini lunch (chicken) mostly because I had the munchies and was trying to stay awake and I always get hungry when I get sleepy in the middle of the day (its a weird habit.... my Nana is the way.... was.... the same way)
we went to half priced books and I found nothing worth getting (no good journals or anything) Stan found a copy of the book "A Princess Bride" and a box set of all the "Rocky" movies!!!!!

I went to bed really early sometime my meds make me super sleepy and sometimes I dont sleep that much. I think the new fangled bipolar medication needs to be increased.

It snowed over night!!!!!!

Monday: it snowed!!!! 7 inches of snow!!!!!
I ate a lot of banana pudding hahaha
we left for Morehead while the snow was on the ground but the road was clear.

We had chinese food in Morehead and chillaxed with Stan's mom.

Stan had to run to Walmart in the middle of the night to get me Tums and Pepto.... well, I mean he didn't have to but he loves me and he did it and I love him very very much.

Tuesday: we went to the Appointment with my mother-in-law Miss Joy... and I said something mean without thinking about it at all..... and I fell really bad and I didn't even know I said it I dont remember saying it and I his in the bedroom most of the day.
We also had chinese. Again. There is a lot of good chinese places in around Morehead

Wednesday: Tanner (stan's cousin) and his girlfriend
we hung out and Tanner and Stan talked a lot and I also talked to Tanner's girlfriend a lot. they made food (made tater tots in the air fryer and it was AMAZING to have tater tots not covered in grease)
there ended up being a lot of people at the apartment and I had to go sit in the bedroom.

Thursday: I met stan's ex Meg at the Fuzzy Duck and it was so cool Meg is awesome and we went to her house and saw her horses and her dogs. then we went back to stan's moms apartment and ordered pizza and hung out for a while. I went to bed early because I was really tired.

Friday: we stated in and chilled. I woke up at 6 and took a nap until 10 am lol
more chinese for dinner!!!!!

Saturday: we loaded up (aka threw everything in the tub that the air matress was in lol and left for home

it was very sad and I have decided to try and drive myself up there to visit my mother in law when I can get the nerve and guts to to do it. also when i get my car fixed.








we did laundry and took some stuff to the storage unit on sunday.

and sunday night we tried to watch the new Thor movie but I fell asleep =(
I slept really hard until the closet rod and all the clothes and shelf fell off the wall!!!!!

it was really loud and scared the shit out of Lilly
we had too much stuff hanging on the rod and the sheet rock gave away


Today is monday and I finally took a shower. lmao

I am trying to slowly clean up the bedroom but there is so much in here and no place to put up the clothes

I am making a little headway in parts of the room i guess.


I ate a can of creamed corn for lunch and i emptied and reformatted the micro SD card in my phone


also today its supposed to storm but i dont think it will

Stan is amazing and going to stop on the way home to get stuff that I need or want and I am so lucky to have him in my life.


 I gotta for play with my phone now....

I also need to help my mom and hold her puppy while she takes scissors to the hair on her back legs and tail to try and get some of her cleaned up a little bit.


Friday, March 9, 2018

friday march 8, 2018 --- WE LEAVE FOR KY TOMORROW

Friday March 9, 2018

sooooo today is the last day before the vacation starts!!!
and i am really excited an am having a better time with my anxiety with my new medications!
i'm hoping the feeling last when i am actually in kentucky and away from home. when i go places away from home.. i feel unsafe because im away from my "safe zone places"
I know the people we are spending out time with are good, wonderful people. I KNOW this, but my anxious paranoid brain is still scared of what might happen. and I wont have anywhere to run to get away because I am in a strange place.
I am hoping the medicine will make this better. but I dont know... I have never been through this with medication before.


I have back two bags. one for shorts pants dresses socks undies ect.
the short probably wont be used but they are just incase. And I have gym shorts for around the house and to sleep in.
the other bag is shirts and tank tops and scarves and hats and i need to try to get a sweater or two in there but i think i might just have to carry them and leave them in the car and get them when i think i need them.

i'm taking boots and normal shoes. and cute socks.
i have my make up packed.and all i need to bath an body and health and beauty.
i have a large purse with my books and planner and stuff. and a small purse that i will take in store and stuff .
I have taken my special washi tape and sticky notes and stuff in a small zippered bag so i can do my planner on the road. and my journal.
I'm taking a book stan got me for christmas to read. and a mandala coloring book and my new amazing color pencils.
i've pack up my meds for the whole trip
and i'm taking a vape to use instead of smoking cigarettes. it will be hard but it will be worth it.
yesterday i wrapped and decorate Mamma Joy's gift and it was so much funnnn.

i have to clean up miss lilly's eating place so its nice and my family can feed here while we are gone.

i'm washing stans last minute packing stuff right now. and some of mine. stan will pack tonight.
and he is going by the store for last minute things we might need.
and we will pre load the car as much as we can tonight.

i have a cube of food to eat on the trip that is soft enough for me to eat with my teeth hurting. when we get back i have an appointment on march 26 to see the dentist.

an on march 28 i see my psychiatrist again... and i hope he will get me with a psychologist or a therapist soon. like really really soon.

i'm gonna go do some last minute stuff and then relax a bit.

I slept last night! i went to bed really early and slept ALL through the night i didnt even wake up to go pee! and miss Lilly woke me up rubbing on my face asking for breakfast... so adorable



i havent typed on a real key board in a long time and i can definitely tell that i am out of practice lol

i will try to update every few days while we are on our trip but i make no promises , because i have no idea how busy i will be. =)

random photo post

halfway done with my book for therapy!  look at my baby girl! she's a princess (and she sheds reallllllllly bad) this is my...