I'm not sure how I feel about the gathering. It was ok but ... I just felt really disenchanted with the whole ordeal. There were so many kids and people that i have no idea what their names are or who they belonged to in the family. Everybody keeps divorcing and remarrying and having another set of kids. And it's like.... Can we please stop breeding now. Family is big enough already.
Ok so on Thursday my husband rescheduled my therapy appointment to Jan. And the very next day I got a phone call telling me he was "leaving the practice"... Now he is very very old. And has been in poor health lately. In the hospital a lot. But last time I saw him he seemed fine. And when Stan was trying to make my appointment he couldn't get anything until January, so it's not like he was tapering off his clientele to let people down easy. So something definitely happened. And I just have this really horrible feeling that he is dead or almost dead. And the lady who called to tell me didn't seem to wanna talk about it. But I told her that he had been in poor health and she seemed to have something click from the tone of her voice. So I'm thinking that I'm right and he is dying or already dead and she just isn't supposed to be telling me because it can be pretty traumatic for unstable patients. I have lost so many good therapist for so many different reasons. I wish just once things could stay stable and regular. However this does give me a chance to pick a new therapist. And they have two different ladies who work with eating disorder problems along with anxiety and bipolar disorder. So maybe this is a hidden blessing.
Tomorrow we are gonna try to eat lunch with my pawpaw and mom and dad. Next week I have to call in refills for my meds and we need to get a few tiny things before we leave for Kentucky on December 22. I am gonna TRY not to pack my entire wardrobe lol, but you know me. I don't know the meaning of "pack light"
So yeah. Last minute shopping, meds, packing up. Securing gifts for everyone. And getting the heck outta here on Saturday. I really hope it snows on or close bro Christmas... I've never had a white Christmas before.
Anyway I am falling asleep trying to type this all out, so I think I has best stop and go to bed.
I know you'll read this Stan so I wanted to say.... I love you. Thank you for being so kind and generous and thoughtful. I don't deserve you and i have no idea how you put up with my crazy ass. I love you.😘😘😘😘😘