Saturday, July 7, 2018

it's been nice the past day or two

My mom and dad went out of town for the past two days to celebrate my dad's birthday.

i've been able to sit in the livingroom and watch whatever I want on tv which was great until I accidentally messed up the TV set up in here and can't get to the direct tv now app lol

a REALLY REALLY bad storm his tuscaloosa yesterday lots of flooding and trees down
it missed us at the house but cause the University of Alabama a lot of trouble.

mom and dad are coming home today and we MIGHT go out to eat but i dunno. i'm feelng really depressed and i have no desire to get ready and leave the house.

i have gained so much weight i dread showering or getting dressed. i dread any and all social situations.
 i just dont want anybody to see me the way i look now.

i feel like i might relapse on my eating disorder which is going to just make my life even more complicated. my psychologist is already overwhelmed with my other problems. i dont know what he will do if this happens on top of that. i know there's an eating disorder specialist at the OTHER clinic this company runs but i cant go there AND here. and id ont know if i can switch over without starting all over again with a psychiatrist.

I guess i will just have to wait and see what happens

I am gonna stop trying to explain myself now. it doesnt matter.

i'm watching some old school tv show on antenna its so funny haha

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