Wednesday, September 2, 2015

almost done with stuff for the fesitival

almost but no quite.

i have had a hard time making myself do it this time.. its so overwhelming
i am dreading it being in Fayette because i know how fayette is and they gossip so bad and i just dont know.... its scary to even think about going there just to visit family let alone have a booth at a big festival trying to sell shi

if my mom wasnt going to be there i would have backed out of it because i cant face that town without her--

i have like.. four more alabama elephant necklaces to make
and some cross ones.. maybe

and then just random friendship bracelets out of that embroidery floss stuff for $1 a pop
and that isnt even necessary just good for kids

my neck and upper back is fucking killing me today and i washed my hair bent over in the bathtub so that made it even worse

im not the smartest . definitely not.

i dont want to cook tonight but i have to do it and i guess it will be easier too because we arent going to make bread and that is the extra part that gets annoying because we run out of counter space
i want a bigger kitchen so badly but i want to get married more than that so... yeah

im so stressed out that this muscle nerve thing or whatever it is right next to the rim of my left eye on the bottom, kind of in the eye lashes.. and it keeps twitching uncontrollably like.. it feels like something wiggling in my eye and its driving me insane

okay i totally forgot about this blog post and left it open

its almost 8pm now and i need to lay down... when i go to bed this early i get up at like.. 5-6am
and i have the quiet time to myself i need to wake up and get my head on straight before having to think about anything.. i need this time to collect myself from sleep-- it takes a while to pull myself out of sleep when i really do sleep.. i have to sit here and start writing in my daily journal and make it up and write a to do list and take my medicine and drink cold water and then i can go back to bed and be with stan while he wakes up for work

i've also realized that if i dont go to bed before him i usually cant fall asleep because he goes to sleep and snores lololol
i know i snore but apparently its not enough to bother him
i, on the other hand, have a hard time with any kind of noise ... save for the hum of the fan and noise making thing i have that lulls me to sleep... it covers up the other noise that i hear if there IS NO NOISE... that high pitched squealing ringing noise that comes when its perfectly silent.
i mean, i knew being in band would be bad for my hearing but i think it did a lot more damage than i thought lololol
i mean, either that or if theres some medical reason for ringing in the ear-- tinnitus or whatever its called i think... i dunno


April and I are both on and we are going to read 30 books before the end of 2015
i have read 10 books most of which i have just read in the past four weeks or so. so really i have READ A LOT in a very SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME
however, i am trying to read a whole years worth of books in less than half a year

but im awesome so i can do this
i need to get more books ideas though
i have been scouring and goodreads and looking for books

we are going to my parents this weekend for a cook out for the first ball game and also to look at the stuff for the festival so we can get an idea on what we need to take next weekend and put it aside and maybe have things as ready as they possibly can be before we get to my parents house NEXT friday night .. cause we are going to stay with them the night before because that puts us 30 miles closer to the festival... less driving time and we can get ourselves better prepaired and sorted out before getting there than we did for the first festival

ok i am going to the bedroom now after i take some sleepy pills and get some fresh water

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