Thursday, July 16, 2015

crazy? i was crazy once...

im not manic .. this is mixed which sucks because that means my moods are going to be all over the place and theres no telling what the hell will happen each day


Stan's friend had collected a massive amount of books on Wicca, paganism, and herbalism and other stuff.. and he is moving so he cleaned out his apartment.. i have a library of Occult literature?? whatt what


guess who is about to start seriously practicing?? haha
im getting ready for Lammas... im going to bake bread from scratch... probably do some herbal stuff in there, i need to read up on stuff. and i can now. i dont have to run to the internet. i have it right here. which is what i want. i hate having to go online... i want a book in my hand so i mark pages and keep notes. its just... better


the person who lives near me with the zelda decals? her friend has an etsy shop and makes the decals and also other stuff.. so i am getting a "coexist" window decal soon... turns out this guy is pagan... small world getting smaller. and in alabama no less... like how weird... so close, the guy was living here up until a while ago.. he was right there and i had no idea.. 

anyways, yeah... so... i have potential to interact with other humans and i am nervous as hell and dont know what to do with myself

i havent been sleeping very well and i have been taking multiple doses of melatonin, chamomile, valerian root, etc.. plus benadryl... every night. nothing worked. so i just got some doxylamine succinate which should work better than benadryl

tonight stan is seeing ANTMAN with his friend Mac and i am at home trying to not go insane... well, this is pretty regular thing now... the me fighting off going insane from boredom

this weekend i wanted to go to Mr.Holmes but its not going to be in tuscaloosa (they arent showing it on the theater site) so we are going to go see TrainWreck.

i went to the thrift store randomly this afternooon without telling Stan-- but he will read this an find out..
AND I AM GLAD I DID BECAUSE THEY HAD AN EVEN BETTER PLANNER CASE THING... its leather, zipper, has pocket on the front. tons of storage. and the binder ring is a full inch instead of half inch so it hold more... it holds DayTimer sized stuff... because daytimer has 7 hole punched.. and the binder goes through three of them.. like a normal binder... i dont know how to explain things hell anyways picture

i feel really icky. its so hot i overheat with this medication im on and its like... that plus my blood sugar crashing every few hours... i just cant really do anything right now.. if i go out i get tired and and weak and its like that summer i was so skinny all over again but im not skinny im just a fat blob.

holy shit i think the doxylamine is working i am going to go get in bed before i lose this opportunity to get some sleep

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