• "why are these redneck-spawn hellions dancing in my yard"
• "lmao we're listening to forever broke from cowboy bebop while roasting stuff on the fire lololol"
• "i hear weird things coming from the other side of the projects :O"
• "boys and girls of everyyy aaaaage wouldn't you like to see marylin manson's genitals"
• "no wait let me rephrase that: i smell like raid wasp and hornet killer AND idgaf"
• "I JUST FUCKING STEPPED ON A TOAD"

• "god that guy looks like a mythical weasel from space with down syndrome"
• ""can you help me with this load of dead syrupy bees?" "no" "FUCK YOU""
• "a victoria's secret catalog just fell out of my ass :<"
• "i smile at people and they look at me like i'm retarded... they're called manners motherfucker get some"
• ""a string of pearls whipped repeatedly against his bloody member""
• "i just explained to some guy how to expel a baby rabbit's bowels"
• "i hate being on live television with combo crumbs all over my face..."
• "pus literally squirted out of my toe like 2 feet in the air IT WAS SO COOL"
• ""i'm gonna walk on every inch of this bread""
• "THAT SPERM WAS YOURS!! WHAT A SPERM-THIEVING WHORE SHE IS!!!"

IT'S THE OPPOSITE OF "THINGS JO SAYS"

YES I AM AMUSED BY MY INSANE IDEAS, SO STFU, THIS IS MY BLOG.

Um, click read more if you really have any interest in this, haha.

just black sharpie

no explanation needed.

What you do is find a book that is old and useless, pick out the words, and make poetry.
It's quite fun. You all should try it. =)

Nothing to really say about this one.
It's just... blaaah.

Just used the usual various colored Sharpie markers.
I'm letting this one show in the news category, since it's the first thing I've scanned and posted in a while. There are even more over in the MISC DOODLES Cat.

-"i get to say "sir" after everything i say to him. "stop it, sir! stop eating my shoe, sir! you're retarded, sir!" it makes it sound like i'm accosting some random man that i don't know."

-"TL;DR i had fun, ran my phone over, and was on tv all over US and canada doing retarded shit... as usual"

-"saturday at work, when i was just sitting there in the 105 degree sun minding my own pathetic business, doc ran over to me and started screaming about a dead groundhog. just another day at the the office, right?!"

-"the monkey has ceased his once incessant sexual propositions"

-"i also remember an outdated video circa the 1970s wherein a dumbass little bitch cocks her dumbass little bitch head affectedly and slowly and deliberately ponders, "but, mrs. whatsherfuck! will we still be able to come to school when we're menstruating?!?!?!!?!?" to which mrs. whatsherfuck replies, with a swish of her 70s hairpiece, "of course, cindy, you ignorant little wench! having a period doesn't stop girls from going to school or work, or continuing with their everyday lives! HAHAHAHAHAHAA!"

-"i begrudgingly pulled on my booty shorts, slapped some sun tan lotion on my obscenely exposed ass cheeks and headed out the door"

-"...pandora's box is filled with fake toenails?"

-"every time they accidentally show the pokemon center on the today show i crap myself"

-"i just shut my nipple in my laptop when i turned it off and closed it... then i turned it back on to tweet about it"

You can all follow Jo on twitter: http://twitter.com/lionbones
Jo is my female soul mate that I can never be with. Instead I will day dream longingly of her curly red crazy hair and clever, insane comments.

...And carried magic secrets in her eyes.