Today is the first day in months i am really struggling with my eating disorder. Last night we went out and i freaked out and that little negative self esteem voice started in on me.... and today I am just sitting here staring at walls in silence while the food I just fixed is getting cold. Still in the microwave. I'm afraid to go in there.
It all feels so unreal..like this can't be happening. It's been so long since I've felt paralyzed by this. I honestly mighty just go back to bed and sleep until tomorrow without eating.
I can't make things make sense. I feel like I'm lost in time suspended between they past and my present life